attention.

what is it about the pursuit of attention that makes it so desirable? i've seen countless people go to extreme measures to get attention from other people. have it be the way they dress, the way they do things, or, what i find most annoying: the way they speak.

the way people speak is how we all relate to each other; how we communicate. somewhere in communication some people can incorporate their desire for attention. no, i'm not talking about tone of voice or word choice. i'm talking about constantly bringing up subjects that clearly no one wants to talk about. or subjects that no one cares about. even subjects that no one wants to know about. especially when the person is hypocritical.

this brings me to a certain friend i have. she constantly puts on an image of tough, bitchy, i-don't-give-a-crap attitude. clearly this is not how she feels. conversations with her always include some sort of "i want attention" attitude. through various interactions with her, i have come to the conclusion that she is insecure. and this has also led me to the conclusion that the pursuit of attention is caused by insecurity.

i haven't ever really had insecurity issues. i'm pretty confident in myself and often don't let others tell me otherwise. because of this, i've never been big on attention, so i really don't understand why people like attention. when the spotlight is on, does insecurity melt away? i fail to see the reasoning behind this. to me, there is no connection.

therefore, pursuing attention isn't a case of positive desire; people don't strive for attention just because they want attention. it is the negative desire to get away from insecurity. this isn't something i can really help with, then. insecurity is slowly bred by years of maltreatment or belittling by friends, family, and peers. it is not something that one person can heal. does this mean that the annoying pursuit of attention cannot be stopped?

this remains a subject i can't lay my finger on.